Tonight at Holocene, a release party for the Portland Funbook, an oversized volume full of puzzles, paper dolls, and big black-and-white pages drawn by local artists and just waiting for you to color them in. (Or alternately, to give to a child in your life who likes to color, depending on how evolved an adult you consider yourself.) Proceeds go to Amnesty International, and your $9 cover gets you a copy the Funbook as well as a 7" w/songs from the Joggers, Parenthetical Girls, the Thermals, and more, which you can awkwardly clutch all night while dancing to Flaspar, Cafeteria Dance Fever, and DJ Ghost Dad. Fun starts at 9 pm.

The highlight of the Funbook for the non-colorers in the Mercury office was the Portland Music Crossword Puzzle. The thing is so poorly designed as to render it pretty much impossible to complete (the perspective recedes so that the boxes get teeny at the back of the page--looks cool, but you can't fit words in it), but it makes for fun trivia.

Such as:
"Sad enough to make you want to stab yourself in the chest," 11 letters (and youch)
"Crowning Jewel of disgusting names and noise," 6 letters (and yuck)
"Not the postmodern Alan Moore comic," 8 letters
"Sun Cycle," 13 letters

A few were so easy they were silly ("Adrian Citrus"), but there were a couple that even the combined powers of our calendar editor and 1/2 of the End Hits staff (who will remain nameless to protect their already tender egos) couldn't solve:

"Error, Error," 12 letters
"Skinnier and not as buoyant," 5 letters
"Laser Light Ship," 12 letters
"Meaner Than Mice," 4 letters

Anyone? (Gently, please.)