In a little over a month I'll be back in our beloved city of Portland, Oregon and far, far away from the hills and burritos and super duper gayness of San Francisco, California. While I will miss these things very, very much I am extremely happy to be coming home. I imagine Odysseus felt exactly like this after sailing across the treacherous icy waters of the ancient Aegean Lakes into his home port of Odysseusland after killing the fire dragons, crossing the Bridge to Terabithia, destroying the Death Star and finally *triumphantly* forgetting Sarah Marshall. Or what have you.

In honor of my return and because I never effing blogged ONE TIME about San Francisco I give you Swoops the Attack Bird.

Swoops and Swoops' babies live in a shrubbery downtown near the corner of California and Front Streets. Swoops attacks anything which comes near the family shrub with a patented (okay probably not patented but it damn well should be) dive bombing technique. Swoops' reign of terror has been covered by CNN and the HuffPo and, as this particular blogger describes, the little blackbird "is pissed".

Clearly, Portland needs some kind of adorably dangerous downtown animal. Suggestions most welcome in the comments.