Anti-health care nutbag in Maryland is detained after standing outside a town hall meeting holding a sign that reads, "Death to Obama" and "Death to Michelle and her two stupid kids." Okay, I'm all for freedom of speech, and I'm also all for the occasional freedom to ass-kick.

Retail sales dip, jobless claims rise, and the "cash for clunkers" program isn't exactly a clunker… but it's not a cherry '73 Gran Torino, either.

Meanwhile, the recession is over in both France and Germany. Well, whoopy-doo for you guys!

A thousand boos to the punks who destroyed these local community gardens. How about this deal: Take food out of peoples' mouths, and receive a foot up your ass?

The "holy grail of Michael Jackson memorabilia" is hitting the auction block. No, not Blanket! The glittery glove! Jeez, you people.

NYC skateboarding legend (and skatepark designer) Andy Kessler passes away of a heart attack at age 48. For those who aren't familiar with him, here's a video that shows him at his bad-assiest.

New Orleans asks Brad Pitt to run for mayor. His response: "I'm running on the gay marriage, no religion, legalization and taxation of marijuana platform. I don't have a chance." I'm really starting to like this guy.

Best Buy accidentally puts an $1,800 TV set on sale for $9.99. (On a related note, why isn't there a "Cash for old, non-flat screen TV clunkers" program?)

And finally, here's today's impersonation of the "Recall Sam" campaign. (Thump… thump… yeah, that's me kicking a dead horse. So recall me, already.)