Bear-aoke: One thing gone forever with the Dirty Duck's closing
  • Bear-aoke: One thing gone forever with the Dirty Duck's closing

Oh daaaaaaang, gurrrrrl!!!

The Dirty Duck, one of the raunchiest old-school gay bars in Stumptown is finally - finally! - closing its doors for good this Sunday, August 23 after more than 25 years in business, according to bar employees authorized to speak on the matter.

"That's the word as of just a few minutes ago," said a Dirty Duck bartender named Steve, about the bar's sudden closure: "this just came down today."

I am totally weeping about this. Like - weeping. When I lived at the Yards at Union Station during the summer and early fall of 2007, the Duck was my spot of choice for shmoozing with the elder gays and getting loaded without laying down a dollar. I swear the place existed in a time vacuum - the ancien regime would saunter in flying their hankies; heavily buzzed blue-collar married dudes would cower in the corner.

The staff was notoriously gruff, except when they were trying to get you in bed. My first time in, I lied to the bartender and told him my name was Rob, and that I was visiting from Chicago. He said he wanted to take me to a Chinese dinner, then to a Beavers game, and then we could end the night playing in his dungeon. I laughed and let him buy me another beer.

So ANYWAY... You've got just a couple more nights before the joint shuts its doors for good: there's a "Broadway Off Broadway Showtunes night" tonight from 7 pm til midnight (hosted by woofy bartender Andy Mangels), and Sunday's out-with-a-bang festivities may include a performance from Sneakin' Out, who got their starts at the bar way back when. The Duck, in case you need to know, is at 439 NW 3rd.