Which of the many entertaining nutcases in Portland is your favorite?

Why do I always have to be included in any Portland roundup of nutcases? (Although it is true that I've bitten the head off a bald eagle—but is that some kind of crime?!?) Anyhoo, toss in your nomination for Portland's greatest nutcase (and any other questions you may have) in the disturbingly sane confines of… QUESTIONLAND!