MAINE!!! Maine votes today on whether to reject a law legalizing same-sex partnerships. To our North, in Washington, they're voting on Referendum 71, which would uphold the state's domestic partnership bill. Here's hoping. And to following the trending topic on Twitter.

ELECTION DAY!!! Kari Chisholm rounds up what to look for today. Democrats in general are nervous that the sucky economy could mean the beginning of Republican gains. Never mind that it's the Republicans who got us into this mess in the first place. Here at the Mercury, we're particularly interested in how the Vancouver mayor's race shakes out...we'll keep you posted.

BARACK'N'BONES!!! Breaking: The President got thin:

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DIDN'T GET THE PRESIDENTIAL MEMO: YOU GOTTA HAVE HEART DISEASE TO LOOK CONFIDENT

RUNAWAY TOYOTAS!!! Safety analysts have found 2000 of the company's cars speeding off at up to 100mph without warning. Awkward.

CALIFORNIA AG'S SPOKESMAN QUITS AFTER SECRETLY TAPING REPORTER!!! He didn't do it "to play gotcha," he says.

I JUST BOUGHT A RAILROAD!!! Celebrity investor Warren Buffet makes an "all-in wager on the economic future of the United States." Funny. I said the same thing when we bought our condo.

KARZAI: "I'LL CLEAN UP GOVERNMENT" Just as soon as all these CNN reporters leave Afghanistan. Honest.

KATE WINSLET!!! Accepts $40,000 from the Daily Mail in libel damages after the paper falsely asserted she lied about her exercise regime.

PHILLIES BEAT YANKEES!!! In game five.

MUHAMMAD, THE BIOPIC!!! Just don't expect to see the Islamic prophet onscreen.

BRAWL AT THE WA-PO!!! 68-year-old editor punches young "cocksucker" upstart in the face. He tells Politico:

"Back when I got into journalism, the idea that a fistfight in a newsroom would turn into a news story was unthinkable," Allen said when reached Monday evening. "The guys in the sports department at the New York Daily News, they had so many, you wouldn’t even look up."

THE ONION IS WRITTEN BY WHITE MEN!!! Ah, but how do they come up with those headlines?

Good day.