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Time for a lightning-quick ticket giveaway, folks. Want to see Fists of the White Lotus at the Hollywood Theatre tonight at 9:45? Grindhouse Film Fest organizer Dan Halsted says you do:

Gordon Liu is out to avenge the destruction of the Shaolin Temple! But oh shit, he's up against an incarnation of the greatest villain in martial arts movie history: the unstoppable white eyebrowed Pai Mei (Gordon Liu played another incarnation of Pai Mei in Kill Bill). Lo Lieh plays the villain here, and he's at his shit-talking, beard-stroking, kung fu annihilating best. He'll even fight while he's naked. But watch out for his kung fu crotch! The opening credit sequence alone is worth the price of admission, and the fight scenes are choreographed by kung fu master Lau Kar Leung (director of 36th Chamber of Shaolin).

As Winson Wolf would say, time is of the essence—so if you want the two tickets to White Lotus that're sitting on my desk, email me no later than noon today and make sure your subject line is "acupuncture kung fu." I'll pick a winner at random before I grab lunch and email them to let 'em know how to pick up their tickets. (Note: If you'll win, you'll need to be able to swing by the Mercury offices [605 NE 21st] no later than 5:30 pm today.)

Have at!