Senate Democrats appear to have come to an uneasy truce on health care, and instead of supporting a straight up public option, are rallying behind "a not-for-profit private insurance option overseen by the federal Office of Personnel Management." Wait... what?

Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner says the Obama administration will extend federal bailouts until next fall, in order to assist American families. (Like the Wall Streets and their neighbors, the Auto Companies?)

Cynicism aside, did the bailout actually work? Watchdog group says, "Weeeellll... kinda."

A bag of sketchy emails written by climate change researchers have been hacked and released by global warming skeptics, who claim that this proves it's all a bunch of hooey. (See next entry.)

For those who still stupidly think that global warming is a hoax, check out this headline: "Giant iceberg heading towards Australia." (And it's pissed.)

Bruce Springsteen is supporting gay marriage in New Jersey! Bruuuuuuce!

Johnny Depp says his latest movie is "great!" (Even though he hasn't seen it yet. But c'mon! He's Johnny Depp!)

Tiger Woods is allegedly moving, with his wife, to a private island close to Sweden to escape the media's glare. His wife knows that Swedish chicks are hot, right?

Two Brooklyn romance language high school teachers are fired after being caught in a naked classroom romp. Now they're speaking MY language! Eh? EH?

Oregon Public Safety Chief John Minnis resigns after being caught in "drunken sex scandal." Not nearly as sexy as the two high school teachers, is it?

And finally, can someone PLEASE explain the internet? Oh, thanks… I never knew the internet was actually just a fax machine that transmits the thoughts of someone who lived 8,000 years ago.