Escaped from Haiti, Jailed in US: Immigration is rounding up Haitian refugees who fled the earthquake without proper visas.

Drill Baby Drill: Obama's new oil plan pisses off people right and left.

No One Was Murdered in Newark this Month! That hasn't happened in the beleaguered New Jersey town since 1966.

Pope is Immune! To contagious lawsuits about sex abuse cover-ups.

Census Shmensus: Only 52 percent of Americans have returned their Census. You can track the slacker states on this map.

Navy Captures Pirates! Yes, the Somali pirate story is back.

The Best April Fools Jokes! Including one from Saddam's son Uday. What a jokester!

Save the Mounted Police? Portland police on horses cost $570,000 a year. That's a lot of hay.

Oregon National Guard Comes Home: Returning from a tough tour of Iraq.