Korea Crisis! You torpedo my submarine?! I blast propaganda at your soldiers!

Military Making More Secrets: The US is "expanding its clandestine activity in the Middle East." That's all we can say.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell Deal! A bill is moving forward to repeal the no-gays-allowed policy, with help from some bullshit compromises.

David Byrne Sues Talking Head: Suing politician Charlie Crist, that is, who used one of Byrne's songs in a campaign commercial without permission.

A Really Harrowing but Important Column about Genital Mutilation: Here.

Oil: Still Spilling. Meanwhile, you can buy a "BP Cares" t-shirt to fund cleanup.

Bono is Injured! U2 Cancels Show! I'm sure someone cares about this.

Racists: Using Their Remaining Brain Cells to Hack Road Signs

Crime is Down! In Oregon's four largest cities.

But... Remember that time Yam Yam's BBQ joint turned out to be a huge drug front? It's coke-dealing kingpin was just sentenced to 13 years.