I'm in a weird predicament.

I am a gay man, and my closest friend, who I have no strong romantic feelings for, is bisexual. He is engaged to this cool girl. She knows that he is bisexual, and that he gets "frustrated" if he is intimate with only one sex for a long period of time. She is not into threesomes apparently, and obviously doesn't want him running around fucking whoever he wants—which is what he is used to. But she is willing to work something out, where he would be able to fuck guys on the side.

So they asked me to be my male friend's "release", meaning someone he can go to for sex throughout their marriage. I mean, I have fucked him before, and I won't lie, I would like to have that experience again—he is no amateur. But isn't this kind of a big responsibility?

Eventually, I would like to be monogamous towards somebody, and I wouldn't want to leave him hanging. I think it was presumptuous for them to think that I'll always be available. However at the moment, I would really like to be able to have sex with him whenever.

What's your opinion?

His Guy Friday

My response after the jump...


La la la.

Let me be clear: I'm not making any general generalizations about bisexuals generally here. I'm talking about this bi guy and this bi guy only.

If this bi guy—this one and only bi guy—is used to doing whoever he wants whenever he wants, HGF, I doubt he'll be satisfied with just one guy on the side, even if that guy is someone as sexy and amazing as you. So this plan seems unworkable to me over the long run as he's used to a certain amount of variety in his sex life. He's unlikely to be satisfied with just you for many of the same reasons he's unlikely to be satisfied with just her.

And even if could limit his man-on-man action to you-and-you only, they're asking for a pretty large commitment from you. You're supposed to be the piece on the side "throughout their marriage"? Couples tend to get self-centered as their wedding dates approach, I realize, but asking someone to commit to sexually service your husband over the thirty- or forty-year life of a marriage seems like a pretty big ask—particularly since servicing this guy doesn't fit into the sexual and romantic future you picture for yourself.

But, hey, you like him, and you're single. So counter proposal: You'll be his fuckbuddy for as long as you wannabe his fuckbuddy. If this winds up working out—and by "this" I mean the marriage of a monogamy-minded straight lady with a bisexual guy who gets frustrated if he has to go without one or the other for too long—you'll most likely be the first in a long string of fuckbuddies. If they can make it work with you, they can make it work with another guy once you bow out.