thermonuclearmushroomcloud.jpg

A short time ago it was revealed that North Korea had fired artillery into South Korea. It is unclear where this development will lead, but the dotted line leading from "cold, snowy night in Portland" to "nuclear missiles raining irradiated death on the West Coast" just got a whole lot shorter.

If the worst comes to pass, I would like to take one of my final moments to thank Bethesda Softworks for the recent release of Fallout: New Vegas. While most of us will be instantaneously atomized or succumb to the horrific effects of radiation after only a short while, those of us who do survive will be thrust into a post-apocalyptic wasteland the likes of which haven't been seen since ... 6 o'clock when I turned off my Xbox 360 and went out for sushi.

New Vegas has its bugs, and hopefully it will be a few years before some asshole decides to weaponize mispronounced latin, but when the Radscorpions come for us β€” and they will β€” I think we should all thank Bethesda for instilling in us a detailed knowledge of exactly what to do (click the Right Bumper to go into VATS mode, target their stingers, and pray for a critical hit).

Thanks Bethesda!