Karaoke-A-Thon Day 2: Karaoke From Hell at Dante's

Comments

1
I'd rather hear "Don't Stop Believin" a billion times than two drunk ladies (it's always a pair) think they're funny doing "Baby Got Back" for the billionth time.
2
I attempted "Mama Tried" by Merle Haggard at Dante's once. It's a simple song -a really short song, too. I fucked it up though; I was really drunk.

You should go to Chopsticks 3 How Can Be lounge on MLK and Columbia. A fascinating mix of trannies and gangstas. Good KJ too, last time I checked.
3
OOH... And Cat n' Beard, if we could list the drunk girl's all time greatest hits, we must include "Paradise City," as done by three-to-five wasted young ladies, shortly before bar close. Inevitably they will have forgotten that the song has verses, not just a chorus.
4
rb,

Claps for attempting Mama Tried with a buzz. It's a tricky karoake song, seems simple and short but you gotta stay disciplined with it.
5
Reason #5 = exactly why I stopped going to Karaoke From Hell after about th 5th trip having actually gotten on stage twice (and yes, I am a great singer, professionally trained, sang lead in several local bands when I lived there).

It's cool if they want to shuffle singers around to make the evening flow better, but leaving people sitting around for 6 hours with no intention to call them up = obnoxious hipster behavior at it's finest.
6
I remember your friend who sang the Buzzcocks... he wasn't looking at the lyric sheet and skipped the last verse and went right into the ending. To bad, he sounded really good and it was fun to play for him. When in doubt look at the guitar players. We'll always give you a cue. Don't be too drunk to read the lyrics, and don't think you don't need to look at the lyric sheet- very few people know the whole song.
Thanks for coming out and writing about us. You did just great with your song (I think only you noticed anything was amiss.)
To all you complaining about getting up: get there early and be polite to the hostess.
If you don't get up in an hour or so go up and ask if she can help you in your quest for stage time (a few dollars will go a long way on a busy night.)
Sometimes we have 40 people signed up before you, sometimes people are throwing down $20 bills. If you don't get up at Dantes, come to the Tiger Bar on Thursdays. It's less crowded, no cover, and a bit more personal as we're only a few feet from you.
thanks again,
dawn
7
Forgive me commenting a second time- it took me a while to figure out how to join the conversation...
I remember your friend who sang the Buzzcocks... he wasn't looking at the lyric sheet and skipped the last verse and went right into the ending. To bad, he sounded really good and it was fun to play for him. When in doubt look at the guitar players. We'll always give you a cue. Don't be too drunk to read the lyrics, and don't think you don't need to look at the lyric sheet- very few people know the whole song.
Thanks for coming out and writing about us. You did just great with your song (I think only you noticed anything was amiss.)
To all you complaining about getting up: get there early and be polite to the hostess.
If you don't get up in an hour or so go up and ask if she can help you in your quest for stage time (a few dollars will go a long way on a busy night.)
Sometimes we have 40 people signed up before you, sometimes people are throwing down $20 bills. If you don't get up at Dantes, come to the Tiger Bar on Thursdays. It's less crowded, no cover, and a bit more personal as we're only a few feet from you.
thanks again,
dawn
8
"Baby Got Back" is a killer it is too damn long when you are doing it Ike and Tina Turner style. Somewhere on You-tube is a video of me almost stroking out about a minute before it ended.
We were playing "Suicide Karaoke" that night and I wonder if Tres decided to stretch it out to watch me drop.

If you don't know the words try "Miss Karaoke" where you have to improve the lyrics for the whole song.
9
I'll get in on this.

As a Karaoke Host (yes, I'm _that_ Darryl Zero), it's hard to strike that delicate balance between what makes the show flow smoothly, what keeps the customers happy, what fulfills our obligations, and what keeps us sane. Most people tend to think keeping the customers happy is of prime importance, especially if alcohol or ego enters into play, and even then, they usually substitute "me" for "the customers."

Unfortunately, it's impossible for us to satisfy everyone's desires every evening, and often the harder we try to be fair and equitable, the more people get upset. Every host develops their own system to try and be as utilitarian as possible. I try to err on the "quantitative" side and get as many people up as possible, because I'm just one guy pushing buttons and don't have to worry about things like fatigue, band chemistry, or whether or not I'm feeling up to ripping through "Rebel Yell" for the trillionth time. I've been a Karaoke From Hell customer for almost seven years, now, and from what I've been able to see, Tres tends to err more on the "qualitative" side--that is, he tends to pick what he's feelin'. Sometimes the band has input, sometimes the hostess does, sometimes the tip jar does (see "obligations")--but the bottom line is that KFH is just trying to keep the show flowing, because when you're playing the same 50 songs three times a week, you have to come up with something to keep your game on, or else nobody has any fun.

Which, really, fun is the most important thing--and if you have to be the one in the spotlight to have fun, I think you're missing the point. I've gone to KFH and not had my name called before. Kind of a bummer, but rather than get butt-hurt about it, I just went back the next week, because I still have fun being there, heckling the band, chatting up the doormen, eating pizza, and enjoying the spectacle of a fun show with cool people. Oh, and by the way--the Karaoke From Hell Band is fun to watch in their own right, a group of awesome musicians who somehow manage to take fifty different singers each week and still have the chemistry to put on a hell of a show.

It's not about how good you are, or how well you can sing, or who you used to sing with, or how many records you sold, or who you used to have a contract with, or what show you were on, or even how much you think you can get the crowd into it (this is all stuff I and other KJ's hear every night to explain why YOU have to sing RIGHT NOW). It's about kicking back and having a good time, singing some silly song you didn't write but love for no real reason other than to do it.

And, if it's not? Well, every Karaoke Host can be bribed somehow. Could be money (nothing less than $20 gets our attention), could be anything--could be the right song (if you want to sing at Stripparaoke and not have to wait--sing Bow Wow Wow's "Do You Wanna Hold Me.") The only way to find out is to ask what that perfect bribe is. Usually, though, the best approach is to just be cool and have fun.
10
What happened to this series? Is it over? Did the author get laryngitis?
11
You know, I think that Buzzcocks screw up was my fault (I play bass in KFH). I went to the ending a verse early and, while it was only two notes, it threw the singer off and he didn't recover very quickly.

Whew... feels good to get that off my chest. Mistakes haunt me.

But the point is valid - Karaoke From Hell songs don't always come out identical to the CD versions. Singers who can adapt to that are going to have the best success rate on our stage.