Being anonymous doesn't automatically mean only write about your annoyances. How about something a little more positive? Your life can't be that bad right? Right? And if it is...maybe it's you.
I love to watch you walk, the way you jiggle under your uniform. So many inappropriate thoughts. You are a newlywed, and I am twice your age. But I never felt more like a dirty old man than that one time. We had been talking, and I offered you a paper napkin to put your gum in. After you left, I realized there was only way I would ever taste your tongue. So I chewed your gum.
EWWW!!! How's that for "positivity," Mary? Read the rest (if you dare) right here, and while you're at it, squeeze out your own I, Anonymous post that I'm sure will smell just like lollipops and Cinnabon.