So every day this week, I'll be bringing you a pathetically useless Blogtown post from 2011. Should you insist on continuing to visit Blogtown during a week when most people are either on vacation or leading lives worth living, you deserve to be reminded that you are an imbecile for continuing to encourage these syphilis-slathered turds. —Frank Cassano
THE FIFTH-WORST BLOGTOWN POST OF 2011: "THE BIEBER BEAT: Happy Birthday, Beebs!" (Tuesday March 1, 2011 at 4:13 pm)
Wm. Steven Humphrey began his 4,932nd pedophilic blog post about child musician Justin Bieber with the rage-inducing phrase, "Geez! I can't belieb I nearly let the day slip away without saying, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JUSTIN BIEBER! (He turns a nearly legal 17-years-old today.)"
CONFIDENTIAL TO THE PORTLAND POLICE: You have allowed Mr. Humphrey free reign throughout your embarrassing little city for entirely too many years, despite a nauseating amount of evidence that decisively proves he should be behind bars, castrated, or, preferably, both. As 2012 approaches, I demand you stop "hugging it out" with those Occupy Portland street urchins and, instead, take immediate action on an issue that actually matters.