SEE YOU AT THE PARTY, RICHTER!—Sci-fi blockbusters don't get more insane than Paul Verhoeven's Total Recall, in which Schwarzenegger gets his ass to Mars—a land of mutants and triple boobs! Tonight, podcasters cortandfatboy (and the Mercury!) present your last chance to see this ridiculous epic before Colin Farrell screws it up with his dumb remake. EH
Bagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne, 11 pm, $3, 21+

COMING UP ROSES—Even when they're less than spectacular, Portland summers are still the best weather ever, and the Rose Fest is our chance to celebrate it, not only with gut-churning rides but with outdoor concerts like tonight's, featuring Y La Bamba, the Decemberists/Dolorean supergroup Black Prairie, And And And, and Lost Lander! MS
Rose Festival, Tom McCall Waterfront Park, SW Naito, 5 pm, all ages, FREE with regular $5 admission