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SANTAAAAA!
—You've tried the rest, now "ho, ho, ho" with the best! Portland's fave Santa is back at Pioneer Courthouse Square—and he's now using TECHNOLOGY to help you avoid long lines! Call, text, or reserve your appointment with Santa online, and he'll text you when it's your turn to hop on his lap. (No "naughty" texts, please.) WSH
Santa House on the Bricks, Pioneer Courthouse Square, SW 6th & Morrison, daily 9 am–9 pm, through Dec 24, FREE, portlandsanta.com

THERE AND BACK AGAIN—From the shadowed caves of the Misty Mountains to the mighty plains of the Rohirrim, every elf, dwarf, hobbit, and ent will be watching The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey! Here is your quest, brave adventurer! Voyage to a distant movie theater and prepare yourself for an adventure most thrilling and—eh, fuck it. You know the drill. EH
Every single theater at every conceivable time of day, see Movie Times for showtimes