Ah, the late '90s and the early '00s! Now that was a time for comic books, my friends. Comic books like Tomb Raider!

Rock Climbing: The Comic!
  • Rock Climbing: The Comic!

Based on the videogame series, Top Cow's Tomb Raider comics started in 1999 and ran for 50 issues. Which leads me to today's news from Dark Horse Comics: A new Tomb Raider comic will launch once the lastest Tomb Raider game hits—and in the meantime, a "48-page, six-part hardcover omnibus" (huh? okay!) will set up the new game's story. Which, sure, fine, but what's really great is the cover for the new comic. Where are you going, Lara? Are you blind? You're walking off the boat!

newtrcover.jpeg

As a dude who's gone on record as loving Danger Girl, I don't have the strongest leg to stand on, but still: Few comic book covers have ever been more ridiculous than those of Top Cow's Tomb Raider books, which were a shameless, nonstop parade of tits, asses, guns, and monsters (to be fair, the above things still sell a lot of terrible comics). In celebration of what's merely the latest ridiculous Tomb Raider cover (seriously, Lara, you're a terrible swimmerat least put on a life vest), let's take a moment to remember the Tomb Raider covers of yore.

The greatest treasure of all? A SIDEKICK THATS A MOTHERFUCKING LION
  • The greatest treasure of all? A SIDEKICK THAT'S A MOTHERFUCKING LION

Im unclear how Lara got in this position but it looks super painful
  • This image was also the cover for the March 1992 issue of Chiropractic Quarterly.

To be fair, its like next to impossible to balance on top of Stonehenge
  • To be fair, it's like next to impossible to balance on top of Stonehenge.

This is the only time a Greg Land cover will look classy in comparison.
  • This is the only time a Greg Land cover will look classy in comparison.

Case in point.
  • Case in point.

A classic of Middle Eastern literature.
  • A classic of Middle Eastern literature.

Theyre currently reading The Casual Vacancy in their book club.
  • Their book club selection? The Casual Vacancy. Vampirella says it's "okay."

Just hanging out at the bottom of a swimming pool. What.
  • ... Hanging Out at the Bottom of a Swimming Pool

The only thing scarier than an avalanche: an avalanche with hands
  • The only thing scarier than an avalanche: an avalanche with hands

If past team-ups are any indication, shes totally going to hook up with Lucky the Leprechaun
  • Lucky the Leprechaun has been waiting his whole life for this day to come

Oh, now this is just getting stupid. Lara would never wear sunglasses at night.
  • Oh, now it's just getting stupid. Lara would never wear sunglasses at night.