GUYS! Guys. GUYS!! Why are you not watching The Americans (Wednesdays, 10 pm, FX)? It's the most exciting, interesting new show to come around the bend in quite a while, and you're just gonna be wasting an entire beautiful sunny weekend in the future catching up on this thing—so jump in NOW and save both of us a lot of trouble. In last night's second episode, the Russian spies posing as American suburbanites have to plant a bug in Secretary of Defense Caspar Weinberger's house (yeah, that Caspar Weinberger) and end up doing some PRETTY TERRIBLE THINGS.
Join me after the jump for some quick spoilery chitty-chat on the subject—and START WATCHING THIS SHOW. (Be the cool "in-the-know" person now, not later!)
- Courtesy FX
- "Umm... yeah... as a matter of fact The Village People are right. Key West is "where life is the best."
So here's what I'm thinking...
So let's momentarily put aside all the sexy sex and touching familial drama and sneaky suspicions from their FBI next door neighbor. WHAT WAS UP WITH THAT PLAN TO PLANT A BUG IN CASPAR WEINBERGER'S HOUSE?
In this episode entitled "The Clock," suburby Rooskies Phillip and Elizabeth are strongly advised to plant a bug in the secretary of defense's study—stat! So after a touch of hand wringing, they settle on a plan to poison the son of Caspar's black maid (????) with an umbrella (????) and then promise to deliver an antidote to the son onLY if the woman steals and returns Caspar's clock (????)—which will be conveniently implanted with a listening device (????!!!!).
This is a terrible, mean thing to do. And yet? Phillip is the nicest poisoner/extortionist you will ever meet—and even when the woman's brother tries to kill him, he breaks the guys arm with a look of true regret on his face.
And though there are some very touchy, intense moments, the bug gets planted and the upper echelon Rooskies get to listen in on Reagan's plans to institute the STAR WARS (not the movie) PROGRAM (?????)!!!
And that's why this show is great, folks—you not only get your sex and your history lessons in one convenient place, you're actually cheering for two Rooskies to terrorize a black woman. AND FEEL ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE ABOUT IT AFTERWARDS. Wow. That's compelling TV. WATCH THIS SHOW.
- Courtesy FX
- "Please do not say another word about my creepy fake moustache."