I'm a hetero woman who watches gay porn sometimes. I find it exciting and perfectly OK. Matter of fact, if my boyfriend stumbled on to my (digital) stash, his likely response would be rolling his eyes and saying, "This again?" The thing that I don't understand is why guys who look at gay porn in secret are automatically assumed to be closeted gays. Are hetero men allergic to gay porn? What is going on?

I'm Terrible At Acronyms So I'm Just Going To Say Kate

My response after the jump...

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Seriously? You can't see the difference between a straight woman watching gay porn and straight man watching gay porn?

Allow me to unpack this fudge for you: you're a straight woman and you're attracted to hot guys. When you watch gay porn, ITAASIJGTSK, you're watching two (or more) hot guys doing things to each other that you would enjoy doing for hot guys or enjoy having done to you by hot guys. You're watching hot guys kiss and suck dick and fuck each other—and, hey, you like to suck the dicks of hot guys and get fucked by hot guys and kiss hot guys. So gay porn works for you. It works on you—it works on you the same way lesbian porn works on straight guys.

But what's in gay porn for a 100% straight guy? There isn't anyone in gay porn he finds attractive—there are no women in gay porn (although sometimes there's pussy)—and a straight guy isn't gonna see anything in gay porn that he wishes he was doing or that he wishes was being done to him. A straight guy doesn't want to suck the dicks of hot guys or have his dick sucked by hot guys, a straight guy doesn't want to fuck the asses of hot guys or have his ass fucked by hot guys, a straight guy doesn't want to kiss hot guys. So gay porn doesn't work for straight guys.

So, ITAASIJGTSK, a straight-identified guy who watches gay porn isn't 100% straight. A straight-identified guy with a girlfriend who loves to eat pussy and secretly watches a little gay porn? That guy is bisexual and closeted. A straight-identified guy without a girlfriend—or one with a girlfriend whose pussy he refuses to eat—who secretly watches a little gay porn? That guy is gay and closeted.