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QUEER—You won't know what hit you: the Accidental Bear Queer Music Summer Tour is about to shimmy its way through Portland, offering queer music from filthy gay rapper Big Dipper, dapper pop craftsman Logan Lynn, and much more. Best of all, each show on the tour raises money for LGBTQ mental health services and suicide prevention—tonight's show benefits Q Center in Portland. NL
w/Conquistador, Rica Shay, Darling Gunsel; Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi, 8 pm, $15

COMEDY—In a way, Greg Fitzsimmons is comedy the way it used to be, devoid of any elaborate conceit or overtly political shtick. Fitzsimmons is merely an average-looking, normal-talking funny dude who's probably been a regular on your television (for the 12 of you that still have television). And now he's in town! DVH
Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th, Thurs 8 pm, Fri-Sat 7:30 & 10 pm, $15-27