FILM—It's rare for comedies—even the great ones—to be as funny as you remember. But for those who have fond memories of 1979's The Jerk, never fear: The inspiring tale of heroic moron Navin Johnson (Steve Martin) and his loyal dog Shithead is just as hilarious as you remember. And if you've never seen The Jerk before, (1) remedy that immediately, and (2) I envy you more than you can possibly know. EH
Academy Theater, 7818 SE Stark, Wed-Thurs 4:55 & 9:25 pm, $4

DOGS—It's time again for the Rose City Classic Dog Show, Portland's five-day-long celebration of all things dog. Sure, you can gawk at the weirdos who're obsessed with inbred purebreds, but more importantly, there'll be way better things to see, like "rally and agility trials," a student art contest, and "classes for beginner puppies 4-6 months old." OH MY GOD! DOGS! EH
Portland Expo Center, 2060 N Marine, Wed 7:30 am-7 pm, Thurs-Sun 8 am-6 pm, $10, seniors 62 & up FREE