The biggest news of the day, of course, is that I'm maybe going to purchase a brand new bicycle—though wailing and gnashing of teeth has not quite subsided from my former bicycle's premature demise last week. You can probably skip the rest of this post, actually. That's the main thing going on. The video at the bottom's pretty great, too.

Flinty silence marked the first face-to-face meeting of opposing sides in Syria's civil war. The groups are meeting in Geneva in a perhaps-doomed effort to hammer out a peace agreement.

Read this pitiable tale of a Portland woman who twice—TWICE—let herself be duped into wiring thousands to fake online suitors and try to form a coherent and sensitive thought about it.

Richard Sherman has been fined a little less than $8,000 for his boastful conduct in the final minutes of Seattle's win against the 49ers on Sunday. Lucky for Commissioner Steve Novick there aren't similar fines in city governance.

"Welcome to the 22nd Winter Olympic Games! Let us allow the pageantry, spirit of genial competition, and ice dancing to kindle a familiar biennial warmth in our hearts. And watch out for suicide bombers.

Less news than weekly occurrence, I suppose, but mall shooting. Oh and by the way: Three school shootings this week. This country has enormous problems.

Egyptians celebrated the three-year anniversary of the successful revolt against Hosni Mubarak in fine and familiar fashion: Deadly street confrontations between demonstrators and a domineering state!

With Washington's relationship with Afghan President Hamid Karzi as strained as ever, Congress has quietly slashed aid to the nation, a potential sign lawmakers have given up on a bid to keep troops there past 2014.

Portland's flawless January weather bafflingly continues.


Listen to Paul Anka berating the shit out of his band. The guys get shirts.