Cue mock pity: McDonald's profits are dipping ever so slightly:
McDonald's said Tuesday that first quarter profit fell 5 percent and sales at stores open at least a year edged down 1.7 percent.
Awww. The solution? A revamp of Ronald McDonald's wardrobe (along with McMuffin selfies?), including both a formal and casual look. As far as you could consider this an issue of fashion, I kind of like it. However, he is still out to crush you and your children's souls through the powers of morbid obesity, type 2 diabetes, and debilitatingly low self-esteem, and no amount processed-mustard-yellow cargo pants 'n' vest co'ords are going to change that.