Every week an editorial staff member will be presented with three events that do not match their personality or interests... like, AT ALL. And here's the fun part: YOU will vote on and pick the event that must be attended by our unlucky staffer. Afterward he or she will review it right here on the blog! NOTE: Everyone's taste is different, right? So while a tiny stripper lube-wrestling match might make Alison feel uncomfortable (down there), Ned might think it's the cat's pajamas! That's why you might find a perfectly pleasant event or two in the list below. Also, competitors must stay for at least two hours (or until the event is over, whichever comes first) and are not allowed to get drunk, or use any substances (drugs) or distractions (phone/reading material) to dull the pain they may experience. Now let's see who is up this week:
Now the thing that's going to happen next is going to piss some of you off to no end—so please believe me when I say, I. DO. NOT. GIVE. A. SINGLE. FUCK.
It's well known that Courtney has a thing for horror movies... but would she feel the same way if she was IN the horror movie? That's why we're not giving you any real choice of events, and we're sending Courtney this weekend to stay overnight at the GREAT HORROR CAMPOUT.
Maybe you've seen the billboards for this thing around town, and was curious about what goes on there. We are, too! That's why we're sending Courtney to this serial killer-themed campout, which is located in the wilds of Beaver Creek, Oregon and according to the website is...
A 12-hour, overnight, interactive horror camping adventure. Campers can choose their level of engagement when they choose their activities and tent zone. The experience can be an extreme horror adventure or a more mild horror adventure. It’s completely up to the camper.
Naturally, we're sending Courtney on the MOST EXTREME HORROR ADVENTURE in which she'll have to share a tent with four total strangers (one of whom might try to hack her into tiny pieces). The organizers advise her to bring a white t-shirt that she doesn't mind getting bloody (??), an underwater snorkle mask (??), and a few changes of underwear (I get that one). Also, apparently she is not allowed to touch the killers, but they are allowed to "touch, bind, and kidnap" her. (GULP!) However, the organizers are quick to point out that it's "all in fun" and there's "no actual danger"... but isn't that exactly what a serial murderer WOULD say?
I also tried to force her to wear a bikini the entire time (like they always do in those sex-crazed teen horror flicks), but our HR department ruined my fun once again. BOOOOOOO, HR!!!! Anyway, that's what she's gonna be doing this weekend for Worst. Night. EVER!, and since I know you're going to cry and moan about not being given a choice this week, you can still offer suggestions in the comments about what she should wear or do, and we'll at least allow you to a chance to vote on something. So go ahead. Cast your useless vote.