There are things you don't like, and some things that you do, and all are up for debate on the Mercury Letters page:

—You do not like it when some punk who moved here merely in 2007 threatens to "get all the musicians, artists, and every other hipster who is fed up with the bullshit, and we'll leave," in reaction to rising rents and condos. Nope. You will tell them how it does not compare to the homelessness that drove you, as a native to flee to South America. You will reminisce how, as a "68-year-old ex-hippie" you've seen the same thing in "the Village, East Village, Woodstock, SoHo, Chelsea, and Brooklyn. Also in Sausalito, the Haight, and SoMa." And you will posit that, "This is a magical place where rampant insecurity has been turned inside out into arrogance of such monumental proportions that [MH] thinks that she and her friends are the ones who define Portland coolness."

—You really like burgers, though! Especially if you are "Burgersandy," who "personally did 19 burgers in six days" during our 2014 edition of the Portland Mercury Burger Week. WOW.