So I had locked my bike up on the hand railing of your establishment while I was next door taking a yoga class. I can just picture you inside your fucking snake oil peddling hypnosis studio, waiting with bated breath for me to finish so you could come out and give me a piece of your mind. At this point you proceeded to march out with your tibetan prayer beads rattling on your wrist, and dump the hottest piece of passive aggressive bullshit on me I've ever encountered, here in the nation's capital of passive aggressiveness. "It's my railing" "I shouldn't have to tell you" "I think this is completely unacceptable." I was just trying to keep my bike out of the rain, if you talked to me like a reasonable human being, I would have understood that this didn't work for you apologized, and been on my way. If i were half the man I was 5 years ago, I would have taken a flame thrower to your patchouli-stink bullshit. Fuck you forever.
Dear New Age Passive Aggressor
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