Hey douchecanoe! Thanks for stealing my purse at the Wishing Well a couple of hours ago while I was singing karaoke! Oh yeah, and my leather jacket from Target and my fugly gray thrift-store sweater. Did you REALLY need to take that sweater? The one with orange buttons I loved that looks like a Cosby sweater after it got eaten and shat out by moles? Yeah, thanks. I hope you felt at least a twinge of guilt when you realized my month's supply of anti-anxiety pills were in there too. I'm going to fuck you in the ass with a tire iron.