S is special. And it may or may not be his fault. When I used to get into conversations with him there was a skiing accident mentioned. (A la Liz Lemon's brother.) He has a new Schwinn.

For the most part S. is ok. BUT YOU HAVE TO TEACH HIM BOUNDARIES AROUND WOMEN. Every single blond woman in the neighborhood gets a needling "hiiii" and all the Starbucks know him because he goes in between them.

None of that is so bad, except more than once I've seen him with his hands dug firmly into his pockets and a massive boner. The "hiiiii" is because he wants to have sex with every blond he sees. And when I walk down the road and see that hand moving up and down the boner, I wonder where the fuck you are. One of these days he's going to whip it out and he'll be arrested as a sexual predator, or worse cut by someone's big bro boyfriend.

Take care of him, goddamn it.