This Week in the Mercury

New Column!

Columns

New Column!

SPONSORED CONTENT: Sirloin Burger Is Your Favorite Campbell's Chunky Soup? You've Gotta Be Shitting Me.


I Love Television™

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

That Internet Dating Thing... AGAIN

Posted by Anonymous on Tue, Oct 9, 2012 at 1:54 PM

Without a DOUBT, each and every time a woman posts a photo with more than one person, she is always the unattractive one. Two people in the photo and one cute? You're not her! Jesus Christ ladies, how about putting up a photo with you and one of your uglier friends? You know, to make yourself look better. Also, if you post photos from weird angles, or just a facial shot... do you know that we know what that means? Do you think all men are stupid? It means you're FAT! You're not fooling anybody. This also pertains to women's profiles WITHOUT a photo at all. Sure, you'll give us some line about how you want to remain 'private', but we all know what that means. It also means you're fat. FAT, I say! I've never seen a pretty girl hide herself. Please, honey. Listen, we're going to find out how ugly or fat you are eventually, so why don't you just be honest about it? And if you're going to take that HORRENDOUS bathroom mirror self portrait, try tidying up the counter beforehand. I'm really tired of looking at your used tissue and dirty towels. One last thing: For the love of all that is holy, NO fake mustaches please!

Comments (10)

Showing 1-10 of 10

 
Subscribe to this thread:
Showing 1-10 of 10

Comments are closed.

Most Commented on I, Anonymous

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC

115 SW Ash St. Suite 600
Portland, OR 97204

Contact Info | Privacy Policy | Production Guidelines | Terms of Use | Takedown Policy