Today is the 8th of December. It is a little bit early to be telling customer service rep.s that their online retail company has RUINED CHRISTMAS. Not that there is ever a reasonable time for this, but please save your retail driven insanity for at least the 15th.
Also, if you wish us to contact USPS to file an insurance claim because of some bogus sounding story about how your package (on the other side of the country from our business at this point) was eaten by wild dogs on your front porch where the carrier left it, you could at least try to sound fucking civil. Not only does your story sound like bullshit - admit it, it was YOUR dog, and it happened inside of your house - but it's not our problem. We are far less likely to make it our problem when you treat us like subhumans.
We try. We really do. We can't control USPS, things going out of stock (ever think of shopping BEFORE black Friday?) or your inability to read/use teh internets. So please, please, this year can you just BE REASONABLE???