I Got Out of Bed Just to Write This


Your dog sounds like a little bitch.
Shower farting? This could well be the next big thing in Japan.
You shall soon savor my wind infidel
This I,A brought to you by the future parent (if not one already) of a fucked-up kid that will grow up to be a champion wind-breaker, bed-farting and cubicle-farting with the best of them. Then little gas-passer jr. will grow up and procreate his/herself, perpetuating this cycle of inconsiderate, shameful, disgusting, gassy-assed humans.

Dignity has left the building (planet).
I had a girlfriend once that suffered from colitis, and the loud ass farts came fast and furious, typically when we were in bed or in public or anywhere else where loud farting is frowned upon. Now, I realize she had colitis and all, but she carried herself as if everybody knew about it and understood her plight. Newsflash- total fucking strangers didnt know and were disgusted.
She’s sleeping, get over it!
It’s when she starts farting your love making music, then you can be mad.
IA, you are FAR worse for hot-doggin* it, which provides a vector for gas spread as opposed to covering it with a blanket.

*hot-doggin' it = shower farting; when opening the shower door is like opening a steamy hot dog at a baseball game