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Sunday, February 3, 2013

Bike Rack Jihab, I Pine for Peace!

Posted by Anonymous on Sun, Feb 3, 2013 at 1:56 PM

Last Friday early evening at Safeway downtown, they've attacked! From the moment I locked up my bike four minutes before, there was a huge dog tied with a rope to the rack & a motorbike blocking me any access to my bike. The dog had no harness & leash combo or muzzle. They were kind of agitated because they their hind paw tangled in the rope.
I've seen this happen one too many times, it's a real life Portlandia sketch. The imbeciles/street urchins who tie up there dogs & motor bikes/cycles that lock them to the already limited space in the bike rack area; I have a long running jihad with you!
Please stop now or in the near future when I encounter this, I will call animal control. Maybe they'll find a home with owners who won't let a dog wait in vain. You on the other hand buy your death sticks & liquor with a side of carob malt balls from the bulk section do. Leave your dog with a friend or tie it up to another pole that's not the bike rack. If a bike falls on your poor dog, who's responsible if your dog gets injured, YOU ARE! Bikes have been known to fall by themselves & I hope it won't be mine on your dog.
I took a while to sort the contents of my pack, then I saw you approach, I said what I had to say. You got catty & told me I had a fat ass. I'M FUCKING WEARING A CHAMOIS & THIGHS! I'm in better physical condition than you will ever will be period!
From now on I will just ride my bike into where ever I have to go, like the hipsters at Whole Foods Market on NW Couch St.

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