Smartphone in the Back Pocket


Back in my day, we'd comb our pompadours to amazing heights with hair balm and goody combs, tunes on the jukebox cost a nickle, and the soda jerk got a Washington if he was lucky.
Hey man, it's 2013. No one thinks they're important because they have a smart phone anymore. Are you one of those weirdos that doesn't have one yet?
DON'T go saying bubble butt like it's a bad thing, my friend.
Everyone in this town cries poor, yet has enough disposable income to buy a phone that allows them to play Super Mario while taking a shit at Regal Cinemas. Talk, text and e-mail- It's all you really need! Unless sending pics of your dinner is really that important....
Back in IA's day, listening to the Victrola and consuming more than 2 chocolate phosphates got the old folks talking about the "good old days".
Yeeeaah, who could be so weird to not have a smart phone nowadays with such applications such as, erm, aaahhhmmm, yeah, who could be so weird.
"I remember when it was a "goody comb" in the back pocket, Greg Kihn on the jukebox, and mullets were the tough guy look."

Damn you're old... My baby-boomer parents are in their mid-60s and even they can't recall that era.
My dinner is more important than anything you've ever done in your life.