Dear Bus Jerks

Comments

1
Did you ask this person (politely or not) to move? If not, you are the problem.
2
^half-agreed. Sometimes I take the outer seat if I'm only going a couple more stops, and am more than happy to let someone in.

But even if they will let you in, if someone is taking the outside seat for the sole purpose of not sitting next to someone, fuck that guy. Doubly so for the guy that sits his backpack down next to him when it could easily be put in his lap.

Half a fuck you to the guy that spreads his legs an uncomfortable distance apart.
3
you shouldn't have to ask them to move. they shouldn't be sitting in an outer seat in the first place. if this happens again, step over their lap in a really obnoxious manner to reach the inner seat. this shouldn't seem rude at all.
4
OMG you mean you had to open your mouth and ask someone to move over? THE HUMANITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
5
Heaven forbid you be forced to pull your passive aggressive head out of your ass long enough to USE YOUR WORDS and ask them to move. Some people just like to avoid being boxed in, or as someone previously mentioned they might not be planning on sitting there much longer.

And if they really are just trying to avoid being near other humans, asking them nicely to move is a great way of making them feel like a jackass without showing the world what a judgmental ass you are.
6
"OMG you mean you had to open your mouth and ask someone to move over?"

I frequently ask people to move over in this situation without opening my mouth. I hold my hand out, fingers pointing down, and flick my wrist in a "hey, shoosh over" movement.

I don't have the same complaint as this I/Aer. It's easy to get access to that seat. What DOES annoy me is when instead of moving over or getting up to allow you to take the window seat, they just shift their legs and expect you to squeeze past them. Just stand up for two seconds!
7
When I see this, I'm often perplexed. I understand not wanting to make conversation with people on the bus, especially if you just want to unplug from the world, get lost in your thoughts and tunes but move the fuck over.
8
I, A why would the "jerkstore" call you and ask you to relay a message?
9
I think the appropriate and civil thing to do is just step over them to the inside seat and rip a big one. Win/win.
10
You think I'm gonna move over and let you trap me in the window seat so you can chat me up? (Though you were sweet to compliment my earrings.)
12
http://soundcloud.com/tanner-7/bus-flies-b…

@Todd- last week I recorded a song about that very thing!
13
"I frequently ask people to move over in this situation without opening my mouth. I hold my hand out, fingers pointing down, and flick my wrist in a "hey, shoosh over" movement. "

Kinda cunty. Not too bad, but still semi cunty.
14
Why should someone have to ask for someone to move over a seat when there's a full bus? That is the dumbest logic ever. It's common fuckin' sense. There's people standing around. Sitting is more comfortable than standing. This equation is not difficult.

There are lots of questions to ask a seat hog, but it's not for them to move over. Maybe like, "why are you such a selfish cockgobbler?"
15
Hey. IA. George Costanza called.

He wants his 'jerk store' joke back.
16
I'm an outer seat sitter for a couple reasons.

I have been boxed in plenty of times by creeps, when there are plenty of completely empty seats. I'm talking situations where there are only four people on the bus and someone sits next to me.

I like to choose who sits next to me, within reason. Obviously none of you have endured the woman on the 15 who gets on with her pants totally crusted from PISSING AND SHITTING THEM. She has wanted to sit next to me and I would rather not dry-heave/throw up in my mouth. (I haven't seen her in awhile, but she haunts my transit nightmares).

Or in the winter where people get on hacking and coughing, I would rather not sit next to you. I get that you may be on your way to the doctor, awesome for taking care of yourself. I would rather not contract whatever you just sneezed out while sitting on half my thigh.

I think it is completely valid to protect my health by not sitting next to people with shit in their pants, or in the midst of the flu. By sitting in the outer seat I have the control to quickly stand up and move or stand if those situations present themselves. I will gladly move over if asked.

As a woman in public I have to also protect myself from creeps. I have been touched "accidentally", rubbed against, and grabbed inappropriately. I don't give a fuck if someone wants to "start a conversation" with me. Just because I am in public I am not obligated to perform my gender by being nice, not taking up space, and talking with those who demand it from me. It's a fucking commute, not a community on the bus.
17
MsVeruca- if you don't like public transportation, get yo azz a bike or a car. All the things you hate about the bus happen in any public place