Sifting Through the Vanity Projects in the Festival's Fourth Year
Listen up all you Portland folks who choose to follow canines around the city every morning and evening collecting doggie dung! This is the life you choose!!! You have no right depositing your endless bags of poo in my garbage can. I pay for the service, and I own the container. I no more want your pup's poop in my garbage can than I want some junkie's needle in there. How many times have I walked down the stairs to find your 4-legged master taking a BIG NASTY STANK right there in my garden? Sure, you smile, humbled by the experience, and slightly apologize. Then, once my back is turned, you toss your shit-bag into my garbage can! I wonder how you feel, knowing that you're a subordinate turd-gatherer to a slobbering, tongue-wagging, butt-sniffer???
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