It was about two weeks that I had been living in a pretty nice house over by the Alberta district. The house I was living in was surrounded by 400K + houses, including the house I was renting with a few friends. About 2AM one night, I was walking home from the Alberta Street and I had to poo really, really, badly. At some point, I started to run home. I made it all the way to my front door steps, and I was out of time. I pulled down my pants and took a shit on the sidewalk buffer. This particular buffer wasn't a grass-only one, it is covered in mulch and has brush, trees, and is very rustic. I was careful to cover my poop in mulch and hid it very well.
A few weeks later, after some rain, my fairly affluent neighbor and I were talking outside on the sidewalk. Sometime during our conversation he points down to the ground and says "hey, it looks like some homeless guy shit in your yard". I look down and I see my half deteriorated turd, and looked at him and I said, "Man, those homeless have some nerve to shit in a yard as nice as mine!" That very night, after a few beers I shared this wonderful story with my friends and we all had a laugh.