When you arrived i was excited to have you as my guest, but after a few mornings spent together I'm disappointed to notice (and I mean truly disappointed) that you fail to wipe your poop skidders off my toilet when you go number 2.
Today you left a smear that could have been used as forensic evidence for determining what you ate mere hours ago. It was the size of a plum stuck to the side; you must have noticed?
Please, be a better guest and remove the skids. Leaving it there for your host to clean is the worst thank you gift ever.