Every goddamn day I have off I have to listen to what seems like 2-5 hours of your fucking leaf blowing starting around 8 or so in the morning. I am talking to you, Volunteers of America. Why don't you find someone to volunteer to rake or sweep up these leave? I work nights and all I want on my mornings and days off is some peace and fucking quiet. If I ever find out whose decision it is to have gas powered lawn equipment going every waking moment, I garungoddamntee you that I will stand outside your house at two in the morning and for 3 hours blast the intensified sound of nails running down a chalkboard. I fucking hate you so much.
Get the best of the Mercury each week in your inbox!