Well it's that time again. Time to bring your entire fuckfaced family on down to biggest cluster fuck in the city; the local grocery. Hell, bring the dog too, there's room.
Make sure you inspect every goddamn egg in every goddamn carton and if you see someone stocking some shelves nearby bring your whole fucking family over to his/her area to stand in their way and ponder.
Also, don't forget to bring some know-it-all-Naomi or Toby type up from LA to tell some random worker what they should carry as their dietary restrictions call for it (and its totes 'nummy).
And lastly, certainly don't let the person behind you go ahead with their 3 items, you are entitled to make them wait.
#pubesinyourkale