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Friday, December 27, 2013

There’s Only Two Must Follow Rules In Life

Posted by Anonymous on Fri, Dec 27, 2013 at 1:58 PM

1. Always use your turn signal. This fucking rule is simply just to protect the body of the innocent. Makes complete fucking sense right?

2. DON’T EVER USE MY FUCKING TOOTHBRUSH! Why? Because it’s MY fucking toothbrush, and it’s not your fucking toothbrush. Just because I brush my teeth in the shower doesn’t give you the right to use it without asking, and not allowing me to defend my toothbrush before battle. You do not get to fucking use it. I wash my whole body in the shower which includes my teeth, so just because it’s in there, and yours is by the sink, doesn’t give you the right to exit the bathroom with “baby I used your toothbrush” spewing from your lips as if it was going to be fine because we romantically kiss. IT’S NOT THE FUCKING SAME!

I get it, with kissing we are absolutely balls deep in each others DNA. I under-fucking-stand that. However, we’re not licking each others teeth when we kiss. Using someone’s toothbrush is exactly the same as chewing on someone’s used dental floss when they’re done. And that’s really fucking gross to me!

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