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Saturday, January 25, 2014

Hungry Hippo

Posted by Anonymous on Sat, Jan 25, 2014 at 7:46 PM

Dear Boyfriend,
Stop eating all my food! I am broke as a pie crust thanks to your passionate eating hobby. Buying groceries always seems to slip your mind, while buying sacks of weed and eating 9 plates of food each day never escapes you.
While you are attempting to satisfy the grand canyon that is your gut, I feel like the understudy for "Kate's Secret" as I force myself to eat just to "keep up", knowing that the cupboards will be empty before you are full.
It is impressive that you can eat a truckload of calories and not gain a pound, but I on the other hand would like to avoid outgrowing my wardrobe just to make sure I get a share of the food I buy. I don't know how much longer I can resist the temptation to start stashing food in weird places like a paranoid squirrel. I know that you are a big boy, but I am not going to cash in on fattening you up- and I work hard for the money that you eat. So start pulling your own weight!

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