In Susan Cheever's Latest, A Nation Built by Lushes (That'd Be Us)
I'm a mostly het male in my mid fifties. When "we all" divorced in 2000, I slept with a bunch of couples and 'accidently' got a few cocks in my mouth. It was really easy to pleasure another male with my mouth, so I began to wonder if this thing where most married males complain they get no blowjobs from their wives, was true. I started running ads to blow married guys on Craigslist and it turns out I was servicing a few men here and there and the consistent story was that the earlier-in-the-marriage blowing had dropped off considerably. I dated women in these past 15 years that said they just can't blow the husband they are pissed off at. I get that, but doesn't that just stop the marriage right there in its tracks? I talked to ladies that said they hadn't blown the husband since their son was born. "So when was that?" The response? "Oh, 15 years ago." What the hell is that, ladies? The simplest, most rewarding act you can ever do for a penis owner is to yawn, wet the tip and in 5 minutes, you get results. It would be much appreciated if you would keep up with the group. Until then, us guys will just blow each other while we wait for you to catch up with the rest of the sexual advanced among us. We got married to get more sex, not less. Please stop incentivizing staying single. Thank you.
Get the best of the Mercury each week in your inbox!