Most days I debate as to if I should kill myself. Most days I am too much of a coward to do it. I suffer from what is called Moderate Severe Depression. I have taken the pills, been in therapy, and yet nothing seems to help.
I ask my friends to hang out and they give me one lame excuse after another. I am always the one asking to hang out, going to their place, keeping the one sided friendship going. I am rarely asked to hang out, and no one ever wants to come to my place. I text happy birthday to people and get no reply, no thank you. Even my own sister won't leave her apartment to hang out with me - I live 1 mile away.
So, is today the day? Should I just end this pointless existance? Is the world better off without me? I think it is.
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