I waited behind you for a good solid 5 minutes before I decided to go buy a 40 and some snacks. I come out, there you are. Still perusing. I did the usual passive aggressive pdx shit, (cleared my throat, sighed, pretended to text and shuffled nearer and nearer, smoke a cig, even cracked my 40) to no avail.

I finally said,"hey man, I already knowwwwww what I want, lemme just get my shit and go"! You turned around and cold cocked me. sucker punched. I got knocked out and when I came to, you were gone. The store clerk got your license plate # and I gave it to the police. Once I get your name and info, there's gonna be trouble.