As this town pushes tip shaming to new levels of the absurd, today was the straw that broke the camel's back.
I bought one bagel from your Old Town bagel shop. Untoasted, no cream cheese, nothing. You put my one single bagel into a paper bag, folded the paper bag and handed it to me. I handed you my debit card, you swiped, then turned around your hip ipad for me to sign but not before a screen popped up asking me whether I wanted to tip you 15%, 20% or 25%. Seriously, get fucked. I hit decline, to which you responded with a sarcastic "thaaaaaaanks a bunch....."
This town really needs to get a grip. Everyone tries so hard to out-give, out-liberal, out-good one another that simply declining to tip for literally 4 seconds of work is seen as blasphemous, as though I took out Dick Cheney's hunting rifle and blew your testicles off. It took you longer to swipe my card and wait for authorization than it did for you to bag that bagel. This is not what tips are for, son. Tips are for actual service industry people. Pouring coffee into a cup? No tip. Bagging a bagel? No tip. Bringing my luggage down from my room and bringing my car around? Tip. Follow this shit?
The expectation of tips for doing nothing is insane. From now on, I'm hitting decline on your ipad. This goes for you too, hip savory & hay iced dairy treat shop on 23rd and all the other hipster establishments their fleece their customers with these bs tip shaming tactics.