Hey... religious solicitor ladies... you knocked on my door and when asked, you admitted to seeing my notice about “No Solicitors: * Political * Religious * Sales. Leave no Materials - Neighborhood Regulation.” But when I asked you more about it, you said, “Oh, yes, we saw the Political and Sales, but didn’t see the ‘religious’ part....” How's that? It was in the same 31-point bulleted type just like the other two. No... you chose to ignore it.

You also acknowledged that you saw the “No Solicitors” notice on the big neighborhood entrance sign, but said, “Well, sometimes, those signs don’t mean anything, that sometimes people want us to come in anyway.”

I then asked you, “So sometimes No means Yes?” And you’re like, “Well, yes. Sometimes people don’t know that they want or need us. We come in love and peace.” I’m all, “So, if No really means Yes, then what about if you were to say No before being raped, do you really mean Yes?” “Oh! We’re not talking about rape!” Ya, well, you’re mistresses of delusion and faulty logic. But crafty, I’ll admit. When I suggested / asked / implored you to leave (pulling out the HOA board member card — hey, I’ve lived here 15 years, a little white lie never hurt anyone), you said “We have friends in the neighborhood.” Ya, right... I'm sure you do. From your previous solicitous trips.

Note — visual of door notice can be found here:
http://www.aracnet.com/~kps/NoSolicitorSign.png