It's Portland Oregon and the year is 2015. Most of you scuzzy fucks who STILL rock this absurd fashion abortion, are the types with zero denaro to begin with (rock-a-billys, hawthorne hippie-sters, meth-headed comb-boilers, weekend biker dudes).

No ones gonna pickpocket you! Put it in your front pocket if you are so worried. If it's for looks and style, invent a time machine and go back to 1991. While you are there, try and find me. I am the guy who has a bandana on my head. Tell me how dumb it looks so maybe i can get laid more often......