Dear Usher at the Arlene Schnitzer on Thursday night for the Bill Moyers speech,

I'm sorry that I yelled at you when you told me that I couldn't bring any food into the auditorium, but I was hungry and had just endured an hour long MAX ride due to the presidential motorcade disrupting traffic. I had just come from work in Fairview and didn't have enough time to eat dinner before the Moyers events started, so I thought I could sneak in my delicious Yumm Baby bowl from Cafe Yumm and eat it discretely like I have done in the past. I know you're just doing your job and you look like a sweet lady, so I apologize if I let my hunger and frustration with the commute cause you to be the scapegoat that night. Once I ate my meal, though, I was happy and felt guilty. You should apply for sainthood.