Okay, kids, you didn't get a good college degree. Instead you got a BA in Conflict Resolution at PSU.

Well, that's okay, just so long as you can scrape together about $2,400.00 before the stock market opens Monday morning and purchase one share of a popular bear fund. If you wait a week, you will never be able to afford it.

SPXS will be worth well in excess of $20M when the S&P 500 drops fifty percent and perhaps $100M when it bottoms out around 1,900.

No fucking shit.